In your arms (TougaxSaionji)
by You-Know-Who
Summary: *Finally finished* How Touga convinced Saionji to become his rose bride.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimers: I only wish they belonged to me...well, Saionji at least. Not so sure about Touga *eyes him suspiciously*

Author's Note: I could write so much about the two of them, so I guess I'll begin with this first part for now. ^^

"Finding you is always so easy," Touga said in a pleasant purr from behind Saionji as he continued to scrub the floors of the kendo room.

He made no reply to that. I'm always so very easy, he thought bitterly.

"I meant no offense," Touga said crouching down next to him to finger his green curls.

Saionji half-heartedly growled and moved away from him concentrating on the floor which--truth be told--he had been washing for the last two hours. 

"Sometimes, Kyouichi, I think you stay here so long in order for me to some up. And when I do, you act like a feral beast," he smirked. 

"Not that I'm complaining, mind you," he added gracefully sitting on the floor and pulling Saionji to him by the loose black belt holding his hakama closed.

Saionji sighed balefully as he was drawn into Touga's lap and his arms tightened around his waist. He tried to pull away but that just made Touga hold onto him all the more firmly.

"Let go of me," he hissed through clenched teeth.

"I don't think I will. Not yet anyway," Touga said coyly leaving one arm in an iron grip around Saionji's waist and using the other to finger his chin. "I'm enjoying myself. Aren't you?"

Saionji scowled.

Touga chuckled moving his fingers down Saionji's throat and to his chest. Saionji resisted his sudden desire to moan and continued to try and move away.

"Worried about your floor, Kyouichi?" Touga asked teasingly before kissing the base of Saionji's throat with soft lips before grazing the skin with his teeth like a vampire.

More of a psychic vampire, Saionji thought miserably as he failed to bit back his next moan.

"N-not hardly, " he managed in a choked voice. "Get off of me, Touga."

"I would, but this is so relaxing," Touga said looking up with smoldering blue eyes.

It was a shame that Saionji missed seeing them. He would have been surprised to see not only devilish lust but a sad soft of love in them as well.

"Which reminds me, my Kyouichi," Touga added in a soft lull caressing Saionji's thigh with the hand that he previously been moving down his chest. "I had something to ask you."

Saionji squirmed frantically trying to get free of him as he did so.

"W-what?" he stammered out in a defeated voice confident he knew where this was going.

It almost made him cry, this endlessly trapped feeling. In addition to the keen sense that he was about to be used again. He couldn't escape it not even in the one place that he still naively hoped would someday provide solace: Touga's arms.

"C-can't you ask Utena whatever it is?" he added trying to affect annoyance. Instead his voice only reflected hurt and jealousy.

"No. It has to be you that I ask," Touga said firmly snaking both his arms around Saionji's to better keep him in place.

Saionji kept silent fighting off a desperate whimper caught in the back of his throat. He might not be able to remain arrogant and indifferent around Touga but that still didn't mean he would show weakness.

Touga stood up abruptly picking Saionji up in his arms as he did so. He smirked before setting Saionji on his feet.

He moved to smack Touga, but he pulled away and caught Saionji's hand instead.

Touga smiled and shook his head bemused. Saionji and Utena weren't so different at all, he thought.

"Come with me, darling and I'll tell you," he said gently pulling Saionji to him by the wrist. He leaned forward bringing Saionji's upturned palm to his lips, kissing it in soft tenderness.

Saionji's facade was torn open during the kiss showing a chasm of pain more deep than Touga had imagined. He hid a wince as Saionji snarled pulling his hand away as though stung by a wasp.

"Fine,'" Saionji said turning away to cradle his hand as though it was broken.

Touga stared at his hands as they moved to seek Saionji out by what he felt to be their own volition.

end part 1


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: I'll try to put up more soon. Finals week will be the death of me. 

Touga had little to say as they got off his motorcycle and walked up to his house. 

He had nearly panicked when Saionji had stood up and spread his arms as he had driven them here. He wasn't sure what he had expected Saionji to do more: fall off the bike and die or grow wings from the small of his back and fly away.

Saionji followed him in silent discontent.

Touga stopped suddenly, pulling Saionji to him cursing himself silently for it, but he couldn't help it really. They remained like that for a few fleeting seconds. He found himself somewhat unsure of himself as he gently pulled Saionji towards the house. 

Saionji sighed and allowed himself to be dragged to Touga's bedroom. 

However, when they reached the bedroom, he remained outside the room and fought against Touga who faced him from the doorway. His desire to remain out in the hall was though he feared entering would curse or scar him for life.

Touga smirked resuming his role as devil's minion. He wrapped his arms around Saionji in an almost mock of the hug only moments before.

"Nervous, Kyouichi," he asked as Saionji tried to pull away.

Saionji only growled in response.

Touga smirked and bent down slightly in order to maneuver Saionji and pull him over his shoulder. Not too difficult mostly due to Saionji's confusion at being swept off his feet and over someone's shoulder.

"Behave yourself, wild one," Touga said with a chuckle as he set Saionji down on the bed.

Saionji glared at him but remained where he had been placed.

Despite protests, Touga mused, Saionji had been rather obedient of late. It troubled him more than he let on truth be told.

Saionji stared at the black silk sheets covering the bed wishing he was somewhere other than Ohtori Academy with a Touga more like the one he used to know. He hadn't felt safe in so long. He wondered if he would be able to even remember what the feeling was like.

He nearly screamed when Touga liad a warm hand on his.

"And now to tell you what I want," Touga said smirking. 

Saionji ignored the tears building and said nothing.

__

You always get what you want, he thought with a hopeless sigh. _Power, respect, adoration, that...girl....._

Touga turned Saionji's chin with his free hand so that they were facing each other.

"I want you to be my rose bride, Kyouichi."

Saionji looked as though he had been stabbed. He turned his face away to regard the night outside. No stars shown in them at all as it was full of dark clouds.

__

A rose bride. A lifeless doll like Anthy. That's what Touga wants, he thought. 

A feeling of pain in his chest made him forget to breathe momentarily. He let the air ou and gasped trying not to cry.

He wished he could find the will to protest this. To protest being used, being a pawn, being nothing. All he could do was think about what he wanted and still didn't have: love and friendship for all eternity.

He wanted to say something, anything to fight this. The only words rising like bile to his lips were "I love you."

How could he say that? How could he even think that?

"Why?" he asked lost in a world of pain and self-loathing.

"Because I want to be the one to save her," he said softly stroking Saionji's cheek. 

Saionji felt a sting far worse than any slap could have given him.

"We could revolutionize the world, Kyouichi," Touga added as if to soften the blow.

"She seems to be doing just fine on her own," Saionji said neutrally managing to force emotion out of his words.

He tried to get out of the bed but Touga stopped him.

"She has not had to confront Akio yet. She can't do this alone. I could---"

"You could what?" Saionji spat out. "You could be her prince? Well, isn't that just wonderful. Just perfect for her. She doesn't seem to want one.

"Not that you'd care or notice. It's all about you. Don't say we will do anything. You don't care what I want. You won't save me but you'll save some girl who doesn't ask for you help or need it. 

"You say Akio is a monster, but what kind of monster are you?"

end of part 2


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: Wow...my bad. It's taken way too long to get this next part out. I promise the next one will be up much, much sooner. :]

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Touga let go of Saionji and brought his hand back as if to slap him.

"Go ahead. You've already won haven't you?" Saionji said miserably lowering his head. "I'm already your rose bride. You don't even have to ask me and you know it."

Touga sighed heavily dropping his hand and forcing himself to leave Saionji alone and not pull him to his arms.

Saionji brought his knees to his chest and stared at the black silk underneath him. His hair fell over his face and he allowed himself to cry silently.

"I....I didn't mean that...you would....I didn't mean to..." Touga said uncertainly finding the effort to be the egotistical prick that he too often was too difficult under the circumstances.

"Don't lie," Saionji said wiping as his eyes and rising from the bed. "You have what you want, don't you? All I want for now is for you not to lie to me. I can't expect much else from you."

Touga found himself feeling simply awful. "Kyouichi...."

Saionji shook his head vehemently and turned away. "Don't speak to me like that. Like you...care."

"I do care, Kyouichi. I can prove it to you when I revolutionize the world."

"By making me a woman? By giving me pink hair?" Saionji said angrily. "Fuck the world. Fuck you and fuck Akio. I wish you'd just love me or even care about me the way things are."

Touga's eyes widened. He has expected the bitterness but the hurt in Saionji's eyes was so intense.

He didn't speak knowing full well the lies he would tell the boy on his bed. Instead he placed a hand on his shoulder and sat down beside him.

Saionji glared at him hostilely. "Aren't you going to say anything?"

"If I did, it would be a lie, Kyouichi. It's not a matter of not wanting to......I just can't...love you.....I care about you....I asked you to be my rose bride didn't I?" Touga said after awhile.

"You'll have to make it work, now won't you?"

Saionji growled and stood up. "I agree to absolutely nothing."

"Kyouichi, you know better than I do, how little that even matters," Touga said smirking in spite of his own desire to comfort his...friend.....or whatever Saionji was to him.

"Besides, it was never a request, Kyouichi."

Saionji turned his back on Touga evidently trying to avoid seeing the seductive smile unfurling on Touga's lips.

Touga moved closer behind him and slide his arms around Saionji's waist. 

"You matter to me though, Kyouichi," Touga said in a purr nuzzling Saionji's neck. "As much as anything can matter to me."

"I hate you," the boy in his arms was able to hiss out before biting his lips.

"We both know that's not true, darling. Even if I win Utena, you'd still be my bride. And the world would change for the both of us. Don't you want that, Saionji?"

Saionji sighed and tried to free himself from the strangle-hold of a grasp that Touga had on him. "Don't...."

"Don't what? Tell you what you want to hear, Kyouichi?" Touga said with a dark edge in his voice kissing the struggling boy and turning him around in his arms afterwards.

"You know perfectly well wha--" Saionji began but his protests were cut off by Touga's lips viciously attacking his own.

~To Be Continued~


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Notes: Well, it's about time I finished this, ne? I haven't been in a real fan fic writing mood in awhile. Hopefully I'll be inspired to finish the other Utena fan fic I'm working on now that this one is finished.

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Saionji moaned into the kiss before he realized what he was doing. He wasn't about to surrender to Touga. To a man who admitted he didn't love him and was using him as a pawn.

He pushed Touga and when this failed to stop him, Saionji bit Touga's lips savagely

Touga backed away rather startled as Saionji wiped the bitter blood away and fought to keep himself from crying.

"You didn't have to do that," Touga said somewhat icily fingering his lips.

"You didn't have to involve me in any of this," Saionji said violet eyes flaring with anger. Anger always came to him quicker than sorrow. He was relying on the anger to keep him from falling apart again.

He turned away from Touga and sighed heavily.

He winced as Touga chuckled. "I just noticed that you still haven't answered my question."

Saionji turned around slightly and watched Touga gracefully land on the bed. He gave Saionji a sexy smile, pushing a stray wisp of red hair back.

Saionji looked down at him, eyebrows twitching in silent fury.

"Well, darling?" Touga whispered in a teasing almost caressing tone of voice. "I don't have all day.

Especially if I have to find a replacement," he added with a shrug.

Saionji growled but if was more a weak sound of desperation than what he had been hoping for.

"You should have no trouble. I have always been easy to replace," he said as emotionally as possible. Under the circumstances, he was rather proud of himself that he had achieved a highly lethal level of apathy.

Touga chuckled and reached up to pat Saionji's cheek.

"Not as easily as you think. Besides, if you're my rose bride who's to say you won't get your wish granted, ne?"

Saionji wasn't sure what to say to that. He frowned. Every time he was about to give up hope, Touga had to twist everything around.

He yelped as Touga pulled him down onto the bed by his hair. Touga moved on top of him with the grace of a dancer and smiled down at him.

"Say yes and maybe someday I'll love you."

Saionji closed his eyes and fought against his body and his heart to not say yes, to not settle for the best Touga seemed capable of. People didn't change because of wishes. Hearts didn't change because of a surrender...because of a defeat.

But what chance did he have anyway? The best he could hope for was the revolution of the world, for better or for worse.

__

For sickness and in health...

Some bride he would be.

He gulped as Touga stared down at him with luminous blue eyes like a psychotic panther pretending it was a domesticated house cat.

"Hai," Saionji managed in a faint whisper in a half-hearted attempt to deny his reply while at the same time giving in to Touga.

Touga chuckled and moved up Saionji's body, pushing his knee between Saionji's legs as he did so.

"Can't hear you, lover. You're going to have to speak-up."

Saionji gritted his teeth and let out a "Yes" and a moan at the same time.

Touga buried his head against Saionji's throat and grazed it with his teeth.

"Now all that remains is to consummate the marriage," Touga said with a toothy grin before he began to remove his uniform.

Saionji closed his eyes and pretended that the world had been revolutionized already. He smiled wistfully imagining himself safe in Touga's arms as the marriage was consummated and the honeymoon began.

~FIN~


End file.
